I have been putting it off too *add to my list*
I have written down my wishes but its so heart breaking to think about I've pushed it to the back of the farthest box of things, behind everything & anything else.
Thanks for the prompt! Cx

Totally agree, making a will is so very important. Briefly, when my father in law died he was a partner in the farm business with my husband. Jim's (fil) share was somewhat more. However, the stupid blank blank didn't make a will. He was of the old school, thought it was a waste of time and couldn't be bothered with all that caper. He died in May 2007. It was December 2009 when we finally had the whole ordeal settled. We weren't in it for the money because he had none to speak of, but also because we're not that sort; but what really pissed us off big time was the fact that James (husband) brother who had/has nothing to do with the farm, too half of Jim's share because Jim didn't bother to make the will. James works his bollocks off on this farm so you can imagine the animosity that caused. We had to give, out of our savings, £11,000 to James brother in order to settle the will. James got £2,500. We had to pay all the costs including funeral expenses, solictors, head stone etc.

But putting the money aspects aside, what this did was stopped James grieving for his father. After realising how stupid that man had been, James couldn't find it in himself to grieve and was just angry at his dad for putting us in that position. Having no respect for the fact that James was married and had a family.

So, yes, making a will is vital. Especially if you have kids and you have money. It doesn't have to be millions as it proved for us, but I would hate to think of the circumstances if we had have had millions. We would have lost an absolute fortune.

CJ xx

Good reminder - always say must do it must do it. And nice to remember Jade - I never met her but she always seemed to be a great mum. I hope her boys are doing ok without her x

Cyrstal-so true but even more so it is important when you have young kids because in the god forbid event that both parents are killed or deathly injured, you want to make sure your kids are taken care of by someone you trust.

The day we signed our will was the worst in my life.

@CJ - I had a similar situation with my dad, bless him, who didn't realise that by not making a will he was storing up heaps of trouble for me, my sister and my mum, particularly as his estate was quite complicated and he was living with his new partner at the time of his death. It was OK in the end (after lots of legal wrangling) but it did make me think how daft it was not to have one if you're a parent x

@Cheshire_Mum, @Cara, @Susie you're right, it is vital x

As soon as our son was born my husband and I made a will so that it was all sorted straight away. We were quite pragmatic about the whole thing so it didn't become an emotional issue.

I read a story about this today and thought how wonderful it was that she has given pretty much everything to her children even to the exclusion of her mother!

And as for the will...WE HAVE TO DO THIS! I know that it needs doing but it's "one of those things" that you put off and put off. Maybe we'll try a DIY Will...we must provide for our girl. Thanks for the gentle reminder! ;)
Karin

As a child who last a parent I always knew where I would go if I lost the other. My children know where they would go and we are happy with the arrangement *but* we have dragged our heels making the will. When visiting with our friend I made a comment about the arrangement and she pointed out that although she would fight to have our wishes respected, legally she would have no leg to stand on. Needless to say we are in the process of drawing it up. Life is too complicated to leave complication for your surviving friends and family.

I've not made a will yet either i really need to get it done. thanks for the reminder xxx

Its also important for Parents to make a Will dealing with Guardianship of their children, or who is to care for them in the event of their death. This is especially important for single parents. A clause in the Will can be included setting out who should care for the child/childen in the event of death. It is recommended that a letter is also written and left with the Will setting out the reasons for the choice of carer. This is in case a Court is involved should there be a dispute and the Parent's reasons are then available.

I would say that Guardianship is critical - especially if you're living abroad. To my horror, a few years ago, I found that under Illinois state law our children couldn't be removed from the state, despite the fact that we have no family here and none in the US to whom they would go anyway.
We now have things in place to prevent them being taken into foster care should anything happen to us, but who knew?

There is no doubt that this is important but the most important factor for me when making our wills was who would care for the children if both my and my husband died. I needed to know that this was sorted now and everyone concerned would know what was what. The children, even at 6 and 9, also know who would look after them if anything happened to mum and dad, although we did only tell them when it came up in conversation. A bit emotional at the time but worth the effort, do it now... x

Can't believe that's a year ago. You're so right though - this is something which is so easily put off. Thanks for the reminder.